There’s this quote from The Fault In Our Stars that Hazel says. It’s one that I’ve come to really understand and kind of love. The quote is this:
A lot of people don’t understand the promises they make these day’s or the power they now have after making that promise. This can apply to all sorts of promises that people say such as: “I love you”, “I won’t hurt you”, “I’ll always be here”, “I’m never leaving”, “I won’t ever do that again”, or “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere”. I mean, we could really go on and on about promises people say that they don’t keep. And we all do it sometimes. Whether it be intentional, or we forgot, or because of other circumstances.
But I don’t think everyone always understands why other people sometimes have a hard time believing the promises made. I’ve had people get upset with me because I wasn’t believing they would keep their promises. It’s not that they themselves didn’t keep promises. It’s the fact that the promises they made (for instance “I’ll always be there” or “I’m not going anywhere” “I’m never leaving”) were always broken. Always. No matter how many times those people tried to reassure me and tell me not to worry that it would never happen. It did, and they left. They were people I never thought would break those promises. So it’s not always they themselves that you don’t believe, it’s the promises they make. I’ve been on both ends of this. Being the person (and still am) who doesn’t believe someone when they promise things – such as saying that they will stay – as well as the person who isn’t believed when I’ve made a promise because of their past. It hurts on both sides. The fact that they don’t give you a chance or believe you, hurts. But, we put people in those passions because we are, or have been hurt, and are terrified to be hurt again.
It’s sad that people come to a point where they can’t believe those who make promises because people breaking promises or hurting them in the past. Just because someone in the past, or the majority of people you know, have hurt you and broken their promises, doesn’t mean that everyone is like that. But we sometimes put up walls to see if someone will try to break them down for the right reasons, or we dare someone to prove us wrong because we want to be proven wrong that they will stay, they mean what they say, or that we mean something to them.